happy early Thanksgiving

I'm hoping to find no reason tomorrow at all to go online, enter into any arguments, or to even have the time to say Happy Thanksgiving on the actual day, so I'm saying it early. Regardless of our politics or our religion, this is a day for family and friends to let each other know how thankful they are for each other. I am thankful for my now excellent health (it wasn't so great at the beginning of the year)  and for my children and for the great love of my life. I'm thankful that my name has not been listed in the obituaries this year, and hopeful that I can stop looking for it on those pages. :-) I am thankful for my dog and for my cat, because I know they love me even more  than I love them. I am thankful that I have at least one old friend to look forward to spending my future years with. (The Roger Miller song says you only need one old friend, so I'm blessed beyond compare to have at least one, and actually a couple, come to think of it.) I'm grateful the there will be no dish washing or moving of furniture  or extra cleaning at my house this year because Thanksgiving will be at the home of my eldest daughter. I'm very thankful that my kids have grown up enough to know it's finally their turn to do the holiday work and let us oldsters enjoy ourselves. I'm thankful that at least one of my parents is still with us, and that I will be seeing one of my brothers for the first time since last year when he finally arrives this afternoon. I am thankful for the cool weather, the warm fireplace, the warmth of the throw on my couch.  Now I'm getting too specific, so I'll just say that I am also thankful for Eric and all of you on here who can enter into a discussion without rancor or bad language.
Y'all have a great Thanksgiving day, enjoy your families, and don't think about politics or religion all day long, except to thank our one creator for all the blessings he's given us. Stuff yourselves!!!! I plan to.

Happy Thanksgiving Otter and ALL others.. I'll be making devilled eggs and stuffing celery first thing in the morning, then taking it all to my brothers house, 5 houses away.. After dinner, it's a trip to Mobile to take dad a plate of food in the nursing home where he's been since falling in June.. I saw him yesterday and he didn't know who I was. Dang althimers and dementia..

Happy Holiday to all here.

Be safe and be happy.

I can't wait to taste the sausage dressing, turkey, and casseroles. Yes, I'm thankful for my health and a great family. I hope y'all have a blessed holiday.

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Jake, my heart goes out to you about your dad. You know that you are there for him and that is all you can do.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone.

Otter wrote:

I'm hoping to find no reason tomorrow at all to go online, enter into any arguments, or to even have the time to say Happy Thanksgiving on the actual day, so I'm saying it early. Regardless of our politics or our religion, this is a day for family and friends to let each other know how thankful they are for each other. I am thankful for my now excellent health (it wasn't so great at the beginning of the year)  and for my children and for the great love of my life. I'm thankful that my name has not been listed in the obituaries this year, and hopeful that I can stop looking for it on those pages. :-) I am thankful for my dog and for my cat, because I know they love me even more  than I love them. I am thankful that I have at least one old friend to look forward to spending my future years with. (The Roger Miller song says you only need one old friend, so I'm blessed beyond compare to have at least one, and actually a couple,  come to think of it.)  I'm grateful the there will be no dish washing or moving of furniture  or extra cleaning at my house this year because Thanksgiving will be at the home of my eldest daughter. I'm very thankful that my kids have grown up enough to know it's finally their turn to do the holiday work and let us oldsters enjoy ourselves. I'm thankful that at least one of my parents is still with us, and that I will be seeing one of my brothers for the first time since last year when he finally arrives this afternoon. I am thankful for the cool weather, the warm fireplace, the warmth of the throw on my couch.  Now I'm getting too specific, so I'll just say that I am also thankful for Eric and all of you on here who can enter into a discussion without rancor or bad language.
Y'all have a great Thanksgiving day, enjoy your families, and don't think about politics or religion all day long, except to thank our one creator for all the blessings he's given us. Stuff yourselves!!!! I plan to.

Beautiful post. Otter! Thank you. And Happy Thanksgiving to you as well.  

Jake92 wrote:

Happy Thanksgiving Otter and ALL others..  I'll be making devilled eggs and stuffing celery first thing in the morning, then taking it all to my brothers house, 5 houses away..  After dinner, it's a trip to Mobile to take dad a plate of food in the nursing home where he's been since falling in June..  I saw him yesterday and he didn't know who I was.  Dang althimers and dementia..  

Hi Jake,

We went through this with my mother. We brought her home from the ACLF for Thanksgiving dinner about four years ago. She slept on the couch the entire time and refused to eat.

When we took her back to the ACLF, she fairly jumped out of the car. She was happy to be back at her "home!" It turned out she had already eaten a huge Thanksgiving dinner at the ACLF before we picked her up, so it was nap time when she got to our house.  

She walked inside the ALF, sat right down in the lap of one of the CNAs, and gave her a big hug. It did my soul good to realize that my mother was indeed happy there.  

Thank you Melissa.. He still wants to get away from "those sick people" and go back home, but home changes from minute to minute from NY, Ocala, Pensacola.. He really has no idea where he is and thinks he's 5-10 miles from home..

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It was great day.  My daughter and her husband are in from Texas and some of the kin folks from Brewton made it down.  Good people, good food.

Jake92 wrote:

Happy Thanksgiving Otter and ALL others..  I'll be making devilled eggs and stuffing celery first thing in the morning, then taking it all to my brothers house, 5 houses away..  After dinner, it's a trip to Mobile to take dad a plate of food in the nursing home where he's been since falling in June..  I saw him yesterday and he didn't know who I was.  Dang althimers and dementia..  

I'm sorry to hear about your dad's condition. I've never had to deal with anyone with alzheimers, and my mother's mind is in excellent condition. She's nearly 92 years old though, and her awareness of her frailties along with her understanding of how close she is to death is constantly with her. She's very afraid of dying even though she is a Christian, and she carries a lot of anger with her over the fact that she can no longer walk and can barely see. Her body is worn out, and she's very impatient with herself over all the things she can no longer do. I had to feed her today at the table, and helping her to the bathroom was a major event during the meal, which embarrassed her.
I don't know all the things that you must go through, and dementia is a terrible thing, I know that. There are people at the Assisted Living center that mom lives at that have dementia and my mother is very sorry for them, but some of them seem to be happy in whatever transitional world they now live in. My mom isn't happy at all and sometimes I think it's because she is so very aware of her age and her situation. I'm not saying I'd rather she have dementia, but I think that sometimes it could make the transition to the other side slightly easier. I know my grandmother talked to her husband for about a year before she died, and she was always very happy when she was doing so. She would laugh and smile, and the fact that he'd been dead for 40 years already didn't seem to matter at all to her. I wondered sometime if she was stuck someplace in the middle and she knew more than we did. I guess what I'm saying is it's harder on the family of someone with dementia than it is on the patient. That's probably not any solace to you but I said it anyway. We had a great day, and I hope all of you did too.

Thank you Otter.. One of the hardest things for mom was admitting thast she could not take care of him and he had to go to a nursing home.. Many many many people have told me that the care giver usually dies before the one being taken care of in cases like theirs. Mom is 89 and is getting better and better other than the cold she caught a few days ago.. Her vision is getting worse but she has an appointment with an eye dr next week.. I have one for myself also.. I know going back and forth to Mobile that I can read the exit signs long before she can.. I take her a few times a week and my brother and sister-in-law take her a few times..

One thing all of us are looking forward to are the Christmas lights at Bellingrath Gardens and also a dinner cruise from the gardens in a few weeks.. I very highly recommend the lights.. They are 65 acres of lights, many of them the brighter LED type.. Last week, I went to get my last look at the flowers and was told there are over 4 million lights.. They get turned on tonight and will be nightly until New Years, but are closed on Christmas night.. I've gone every year since 2004.. Call to reserve tickets or be ready to wait in line at the door..

My mom had dementia... mostly just poor memory... and I was honored to have her live with us for her waning years, passing at age 92. She was ambulatory enough to go to the restroom by herself, and she wouldn't go outside any farther than the front porch. When she said she didn't want to be eating "our" food, we put a big bowl on the kitchen counter and put nutritious snacks and sweets in it, and that was "her" bowl.

She was like a kid in some ways... like when she wanted to eat her restaurant salad with her hands. When I told her I was going to put her out in the car, she stuck her tongue out at me, lol.

She was easily amazed, especially when we would drive by a large car lot. She would always say in an excited manner, "Look at all the cars!" Restaurants we had taken her to dozens of times were an exciting "new" experience to her and she was puzzled when the staff called her by name. I would respond by saying that she was "famous worldwide".

I think dementia was kind to her. Yeah, she sometimes would refer to my wife as "that woman", but she didn't seem to be unhappy or dwell on her limitations.

She would forget where we were during the day while we were working, and she wondered when we would get back home. So, we put a dry-erase whiteboard outside her bedroom and made notes on it as to where we were going, when we expected to be home, and put phone numbers on it.

I hope my end goes as peacefully as her passing.